40+ banking jokes and puns that would make a banknote laugh

0
Maitree Rimthong / Pexels

Comedy legends like Joan Rivers, Wanda Sykes, Jerry Seinfeld, Chris Rock and so many others discovered a secret long ago: The great equalizer in comedy is to find humor in mundane, everyday shared experiences. . It is then that comedy becomes a universal language. Activities like going to the dentist, doing your taxes, and watching your plumber (and his crack plumber) in action are comedy gold. Hey, we’ve all been there – that’s why it’s funny.

Another example of fastidious, soul-hungry activity is going to the bank. Long queues, outdated technology, chain pens that perpetually run out of ink… it’s a journey. This is why banking jokes and puns are so fun and silly. Sure, accountant jokes and money puns can be itchy at times, but there is something about a good loan shark joke that works well. So with that in mind, we’ve rounded up the most ridiculous and ridiculous banking jokes that even your cashier would laugh at.

  1. Give a man a gun and he’ll rob a bank.
    Give a man a bank and he’ll rob everyone.
  2. What did the football coach say when he went to the bank?
    “I want my quarterback!
  3. Why did the cashier lose his job at the bank?
    An old lady asked him to check her balance so he knocked her over.
  4. Why didn’t the skeleton rob the bank?
    He didn’t have the courage.
  5. If you have no interest in the bank
    You are not a loan.
  6. Why was the lumberjack arrested at the bank?
    He walked into a bank, pointed a long, thin piece of wood at the ceiling and shouted, “It’s a heist! “
  7. If money talks, why do we need bank tellers?
  8. When is it raining money?
    When there is a “change” in the weather.
  9. What did the actor say when he entered a bank?
    This is a stand-up.
  10. A naked man robbed a bank.
    No one could remember his face.
  11. A basketball player and a horse jockey have just robbed the bank.
    The police are looking high and low for the culprits.
  12. Why did the owner of the bank buy cows?
    To strengthen security.
  13. What do you call a man with a head full of change?
    Headquarter.
  14. Where do fish keep their money?
    Along the river.
  15. The people who rob jewelry stores and banks are pretty bad.
    But the people who rob bakeries really take the cake.
  16. What did the recluse say to the cashier when he needed money?
    “Leave me a loan. “
  17. Why are Irish bankers so successful?
    Because their capital is still Dublin.
  18. Why is a river rich?
    Because he has two banks.
  19. Why do the guards have so much money in the bank?
    They are really good for saving money.
  20. My dad would always tell me, “Work until your bank account looks like a phone number,” so I did.
    Account balance: $ 9.11.
  21. I had an account in a bank in the North Pole.
    They froze all my assets.
  22. What did Nut say when he detained the bank?
    “Give me all the cashews!” “
  23. What do you call when you cross a banker and a fish?
    A loan shark.
  24. Why did the old man bring raisins to the bank?
    He wanted to open a checking account.
  25. If money doesn’t grow on trees, then why do banks have branches?
  26. A criminal robbed a bank wearing a suit made up of many mirrors.
    But he surrendered after taking the time to think it over.
    Fortunately, the judge was indulgent, as he saw himself a lot in the young man.
  27. My uncle always told me he had a fortune in a safe.
    He left me the key in his will.
    I went to the bank, shaking with anticipation, got access to the box, took it to the private viewing room.
    I opened the box and looked inside, there was an envelope inside, when I opened it a folded piece of paper fell out.
    I read it and it said, “Good things await you. Your lucky numbers are 6, 10 and 13.
  28. Why did the little old lady put her money in the freezer?
    She wanted hard cash.
  29. I quit my job at the bank today.
    I guess you can tell I lost interest.
  30. The bank must really love me.
    They keep telling me that my loan is unpaid.
  31. Why did the tightrope walker go to the bank?
    To check his balance.
  32. Have you heard of the gold digger?
    They enjoy leisurely romantic walks to the Bank of America.
  33. Chuck Norris doesn’t have a bank account.
    He just tells the bank how much money he needs.
  34. What did the cashier say to the customer?
    “I bank you a lot. “
  35. What’s the hardest part of being addicted to banking?
    Withdrawals.
  36. What did the tree do when the bank closed?
    Started its own branch.
  37. Always borrow money from a pessimist,
    He won’t expect it in return.
  38. Why is the banker dead?
    He took it.
  39. Sign above the bank teller: “To err is human,
    forgiveness is not banking policy.
  40. What do fish use for money?
    Sand dollars.
  41. I went to the bank to apply for a personal loan.
    Then they found out that I wanted to be a rapper. So they didn’t want to post Malone.
  42. What do you call a boy named John who has a lot of money?
    Johnny Cash.


Source link

Leave A Reply

Your email address will not be published.